a look into the change

I was sitting in church the other day and an epiphany came to me .

As much as every part of me wishes I could go back into time and change what happened. To forget the past. As much as it hurts to remember it all. I NEVER want to erase it. It is what has made and shaped me into who I am today. The wounds they hurt. But the scars remind me. I don't ever want to go back.He is the only One worth living for and the only One, in my search that I had for love, that truly loves me.

The last year where I fell down lower than I could of ever imagined. The truth is to look at an even bigger picture to help the healing process.
1. One year of my almost 20 is 2% of my life. Not a real big number and only growing smaller as every second passes.
2. I get to live forever in a matter of speaking. Because of His grace and death on the cross and my surrender to Him and the power of redemption, I get to live in heaven with Him eternally. Which is longer than forever. So one year of forever is, well very insignificant.
3. The year will be my physical past. and it may stay in my memory and leave scars that will never be erased. But my spiritual past was wiped clean. Through the eyes of God I have been made as white as snow. In the end that is all that matters. The way others see me is insignificant. He sees me as a child come home. The prodigal. In the end, being set free is all that matters.

the stress to not stress

I find it humorous that I misplace my money backup plan. It is as if God is like.. 'What do you not fully trust me that you fell you need a back up plan?'. So I am try to just give it to Him and let it be in His hands. I tell you what though that is not easy.

I have been kept on my toes the last few weeks. School causing havoc and money mayhem. It is the hardest thing to completely give it all to God hands down.

I know He knows what He is doing and that it is all in His control.

cousin innocent cuteness

Devin- "cant you wear your contacts"
Me- "yeah why?"
D- "cuz then you'll be cute"
Me- "What are you saying I am not cute with glasses?"
D- "Your are still cute with glasses'
Me- "oh i see how it is :P "
D- "its just your contacts makes your makups pops"

oh man toooo cute i love him :)